OOPSIE DOOPSIE

If you haven’t used the excuse, I’m sure you’ve heard someone else say, “Oh, mom brain!” The Breakwomb did a hilarious skit with mom brain, and I’ll do the favor of sharing it with you right now …

I’ll give you a moment to compose yourself after that amazingness.

“Mom brain” has been getting moms out of missing the peanut butter in that peanut butter and jelly sandwich for years. This phrase is often code for “overworked-forgetful-whoa-man-that-still-does-it-all-but-still-forgetful.” In other words, it’s not always the nicest excuse to toss out on the table. It’s basically blaming the fact that you’re a mom for a fault – no matter how crazy that fault may be, like leaving the garage door open and allowing a pack of wolves to ransack the place. Not a huge fan. I’m not trying to be dramatic but {HELLO!} I know these little things that run around uncontrollably, a.k.a. our kids, may steal our youth, boobs, date nights and lives but isn’t that what we signed up for? And, yes, they steal our brains. It’s out of control … but we can handle it. We can handle it BECAUSE we have the mom brain. <Yes, this makes sense. Because it’s mom brain.>

Let’s set the mom brain straight.

What does my mom brain actually sound like?

/// New Lion Roar premiere date was announced on television. Tell hubs to schedule U-verse, write down on calendar, do I need to tell g-parents?

/// Wait, did I take her extra pair of underwear out of this bag? What bag is it in? I thought that ziploc bag was in THIS bag!

/// Did she get a vegetable today?

/// Don’t curse. Don’t curse. Don’t curse.

/// I wonder how long I can sit here before she notices that I’m just sitting here …

/// Does she have enough night underwear clean?

/// Tigger is always sick. Why is he always sick??

/// She smells so good in the morning. I could eat her.

/// <prepping meal> I know she’s not going to touch this.

/// How did that mom get her bubbles so big?? I need to know where she gets her bubbles.

/// She already grew out of these?

/// “It’s gonna be my time … to show them all that I’m … SOPHIA THE FIRST!!!”

/// Can we just have ice cream for dinner? Would that be the worst thing for just one night? F*** it.

/// She’s my best friend.

/// Well, she’s my worst enemy.

/// Why does she hate me so much?

/// How did I get so lucky?

/// I wonder if that waitress actually mixed water with this lemonade …

It’s a jumbled mash-up of thoughts and emotions. Not faults. Not excuses. It’s what goes on in our mind … because we’re moms. We can’t turn it off the constant stream of mom brain.

The list could go on and on. And it’s just exhilarating and exhausting at the same time. I wouldn’t shut if off if I could.
I’m sure you’ve got a few that stick out in your mind. What goes on in your mom brain?